2019 Durgin Paint Forge. All rights reserved

Search

Broken news!


EPISODE I

It's a matter of details.

You know: the whole story of mankind is a matter of details. Once upon a time, my kin built up the Roman empire. At that time, my homeland language was the common one in the vastest empire ever. Nowadays, judging by what I read everyday on Facebook, only 52% of Italian people speaks Italian language fluently. The world established that English is the language of the modern age, and the present world dominated by social media, google algorithms and guru of marketing imposes to us, little ants of business, to produce contents for the sake of the God of Contents. Without contents, it seems that this kind of sorcery called "SEO" doesn't work. And without SEO, you won't see my website. No attention = no funds. No funds = no dwarves in the future.


Don't misunderstand me: I'm an egocentric and talkative guy and I could spend all my day writing contents basically on everything. But as you've clearly noticed, reading these first lines, is that...my english sucks.

"Well, just pay someone to translate your deliriums in a proper english, no?"

A legit statement, but indeed it breaks the first rule of a Ligurian businessman: "Do not spend money, unless STRICTLY necessary".

If you think that translating a blog post, for engagement purposes, is necessary, I'm sorry my friends, but you have just been rejected at your first Ligurian Exam.

"What is, properly, a Ligurian?"

I can't answer this question without making a politically incorrect statement, stuffed with stereotypes and historical revisionism: but being myself a Ligurian, I think it's ok.

If you are Italian: skip this part.

If you are not Italian, to better understand my words I think it's better to clarify an important premise: Italy never exits from the "Age of Municipalities" (it's like Age of Sigmar, but with a proper background).

Before Italy was reunited under a single banner, we were divided up into infinite municipalities, regions, provinces etc. And basically: we hated each other. With no exception.


During that period, an infinite series of prejudices and stereotypes were cemented and, since we are practical people, we established for once the typical characteristics of each people of us.

Ligurians, for example, are greedy and inhospitable persons: it is said, for example, that the boomerang-shape of Liguria is just made to remember foreigners to come back where they came from.

Since the beginning of time, Ligurians were tough people, used to trade with nebulous neighbors or defend themselves from the assaults of the Saracens: we HAD to be suspicious of anybody, and our stingy land obliged us not to waste anything.

For this reason, Ligurians hate to spend money: it's hard to earn them, and if there is a thing in Earth that Ligurians hate more than spending money, is the fatigue itself.

For this reason, for generations Ligurians refined up to master a way of life marked on "maximum yield, with less effort".

If, for any reason, something is not really essential, it is not worth doing.

It's not my fault, it's my DNA: I hope that now you understand me.

Translating this blog posts, that probably would be read by my mother and a couple of other individuals, it's not essential and the Ligurian that lives in me doesn't allow me to spend money on a proper translation.

However, for some reason I have to give you contents, so here is explained this new format: Broken News!

A series of unfortunate events, tasty updates and whatever pleases the God of Contents.

Moreover: with this blog I want to establish with you a strict, intimate and passionate communication. If you found a minute to read even just a line of this website, you surely understood that Durgin Paint Forge is not based on a rigid, serious way of communicating.

Not at all.

I'm a 30 years old guy that creates fantasy miniatures for a living.

I spent my days imagining what kind of bizarre character I could design to impress you: a napoleonic-style soldier riding a gigantic primitive bird? Yeah, we made it!

For this reason, I really can't suit the businessman clothes, and communicating with you as a sort of society engaged in something essentials for the human being. It would be ridiculous.

Broken News is born to take the best from a necessity, and try to create something cool: a sort of stream of consciousness, to bring you in my reality and, possibly, share together our point of views.

So, let's start from something uncomfortable, the first question I would like to ask you without any kind of filter: If you could edit the prices of my miniatures, what changes would you make? And why?

Let the game begins.

Matteo

#liguria #news #miniatures #seo #dwarves

14 views